from the back of the cosmic junk drawer

2008-06-06T07:16:00.000-07:00

Came home last night about 10pm last night and the power was out due to storms. I immediately felt very hobbled by my own life. I was humbled. Immediately. I had plans to jump online, nuke something to eat, and probably fall asleep in front of the tv. All of those plans were cancelled. Oh wait, I'm supposed to say "I went green". I stumbled around and found some candles, (thanks again for the cool christmas gift of a homemade candle in a christmas coffee cup, Gette!) I cooked some turkey on the stove, read by candlelight, ate my turkey sammich, and was all ready for my new green life to start when the lights went on. I of course, put the book down, and decided to see what was on tv. It only took 20 seconds to jump back into the old life! It amazed me how spoiled we are! Power at the flick of a switch. And how screwed we are when it all goes away! I was even in a little bit of denial. Was it just my house thats out? I looked at all the neighbors houses and they of course were out too. I watched a great South Park episode a few nights ago about this very thing. Say what you want about South Park but its a very inciteful show at times! The whole community freaked out when all of the internet went out. Somefolks jumped on the oregon trail and headed west to Californy because there was word of internet still out there! Its a farce of course but I kind of share the same common idea right now. Its a complete shock when my little electric world gets turned upside down for just an hour. You immediately think now what do I do? All my plans changed. I dont mean to make a huge deal out of this, but it really got me thinking about how really lucky we are and how much of our lives actually depend on electricity. And when some of us decide to rough it and get away from it all and go camping. What do we bring with us? For some of us we have Fifth wheel campers that are just smaller versions of our homes. Actually I have seen campers that are nicer than my house, but due to my not wanting to completely bum myself out, I am not going to dwell on that idea at all! So, I suppose I should get going. Gotta go see how much generators are. Just kidding.

2008-06-05T13:56:00.000-07:00

Well, summer is unofficially here with rain pretty much every day. Seriously. This sucks. Its like living in Washington state all over again. No wonder I have no energy lately. Anyway Mom came to visit from Phoenix 3 weeks ago. It was really nice to see her again. She left this morning to go back already. I actually did pretty good about finding the time to see her. Ready for this? 3 weeks, 2 weekends, guess how many visits I squeezed in. Pencils down, pass your test booklets to the front of the class. 6 times. Thats huge for me! Big good son points awarded!

Works been going good. Found plenty of work lately. Except today. With all the damp weather my sheetrock mud from yesterday wasnt dry yet when I checked it this morning so its been a big stupid day off for me so far. I am going in later to see if its dry. Maybe. Been cleaning house today. It needs it pretty bad with all the steady work lately. Thank you Lord!

Had a date a few weeks ago and went to see the new Indiana Jones flick! Good stuff! The date and the flick! But enough about her. i am a huge Indiana Jones fan! And have been one for many years. In fact I have the box set. ON VHS! Thats how long! Great movie! Worth the wait! I really like the fact that they didnt try to hide the fact Indy was 20 years older and instead used it to their advantage and built the story around it.

I have seriusly underestimated my cat. I used to think he was afraid of his own shadow, only to find him batting around a baby garter snake today! Never thought I would see that! Freakin cool. Well, thats about it for now. I bid you Good Day!

2008-04-03T19:37:00.000-07:00

WOO HOO! SPRING IS HERE!
I think. The snow is gone. Kids are jumping other kids in the street on skateboards. And I think I saw some grass poking through some mud and snow. And I had a fleeting thought of turning off the space heater this morning. Maybe tomorrow. The sun was out for the whole day today! Wow! I actually get in a better mood this time of year! Good times!

I have been working for a friend of mine the last few weeks fixing up this house he bought at an auction. Its got a great little cabin in the back where I have been doing most of the work. Painting, new tile floor, cleaning, some new trim, the whole ball of wax. it always been great working for friends. Their the best bosses! They buy you lunch, feed you supper, and stop by to visit. I almost feel guilty charging him. Almost. Its going really well. And its got a few challenges where I get to be a little crafty with extra trim. Cooool. Its the small things like that wich make the job interesting!

Oh, the times are a changin'! I was having lunch with a freind of mine today who has done a huge amount of work on his place in town. He recently got it appraised and found out that it is worth the same amount as when he bought it due to the current housing market depreciation. Im talking full basement renovation, new shingles, and siding. Same price. Used to be if you painted your house it went up in value! Not anymore. This worries me about where this country is heading. Well, I have been worried before, but this makes it even more bleak for the old housing market. Not good at all. Makes me pretty happy I own my own house. Count your blessings, friends!

Weelllllll, thats gonna do it for tonight. Have a great day, and you can still get in one really dirty snowman before it all returns to green grass and budding trees!

2008-04-02T18:22:00.000-07:00

If you want all your wishes and dreams to come true, send this blog to ten people in 10 minutes.

Sound pretty stupid huh?

Yep.

I get so freakin tired of opening up my email and finding the internet version of the chain letter. Oh, and the grandaddy of em all titled If I dont get this back, your a non believing heathen or something like that. Im gonna do some serious ranting here so belt the kids in, turn down the volume, and put the delicious beverage you are enjoying in a spillproof container. I think its high time to put an and to forwards about good things happening to people just because they sent on this message of complete crap to 10 friends. I have 10 freinds, thats not the problem. In fact I still HAVE 10 friends because I dont send them promises of wealth, fame, fortune, good health, and to not die in a horrible freak accidents because I didnt care enough to send it on! Now, I will be honest, early on in my days of emailing, I did pass on a few urban legends, but I learned my lesson. I just wish the rest of the population was on the same page. In fact, I remember trying to keep Saved by an Angel or something on the air by sending this message on only to find that it was cancelled long ago and the person who started the whole fight was, well... dead. I say this not to embarrass myself but to prove a point. That we all get a little happy with cluttering up inboxes with crap that has been going around since Al Gore invented the internet. I know, I know, he didnt really. I know people who believe that forwarding some one an email about Angels, freinds, and bunnies is the same thing as sending an actual"Hi! Hows it going? I am busy myself. Dont forget about lunch with me on Friday" email! I guess my main point is, If you want something good to happen to you, if you fear something bad will happen to you, and if you want to find out more about Angels, freinds, and miracles, Pray and read the bible, there you will truly have a much better chance of good things happening to you, than pure superstition. And you get to keep your friends. Dont get me wrong, I still enjoy emails about how much George Bush is a Dumbass, How cold it is, Getting to know your friends better, and hilarious cartoons and videos, just nothing about how much better my life will be if I send this on to other folks. If I agree, I reserve the right to agree silently, and maybe a chuckle or two. And the thing that really pisses me off is when you actually tell the person you dont want or like the chain letter forwards, AND THEY STILL KEEP SENDING THEM! COME ON! What more do I have to do! Send a registered snail mail that they have so sign for, so I know they get the message? Dude! Seriously! Am I the only one out there? Let me know. Well, I feel better. I am about outta steam. Ahhhhhhhh... so this is why people blog. Oh, and just to be sure folks get the message could you send this on to... Ha, just kidding. Pray, talk to God, be a good friend, and do your best to be good person. Thats your best bet to true fortune.

2008-03-27T08:05:00.000-07:00

I GOT TAGGED!

What a great way to get me to post! Thanks, Gette! So I just have to tell you seven random things about myself.
I am left handed.
I am a veteran of Desert Storm. I am not a huge fan of the recent war, though.
I am a phone call and pop in guy, but am slowly becoming a texter and emailer. Conform, dammit, I must conform!!!!!
My favorite websites to listen to are RadioLab, never not funny, Le Show, This American Life, Decoder Ring Theatre, and Audiobible.com.
I have controlled high blood pressure. My heart beats too fast. Probably from having to try to push all the Toblerone and Taco bell sludge through my arteries.
I am a firm believer that normal is boring. I tend to gravitate towards the quirky, weird, and misunderstood... and put myself at the top of the list.
I suffer from a bad case of habitual procrastination. Its the main reason it took me a week to reply to being tagged!

Well, I hope this was halfway interesting. Its amazing how hard it is to come up with 7 random things!

2008-02-25T13:14:00.000-08:00

And this, my fellow travelers through time, space, and reality shows, is why my life is exciting. And around here, you take exciting where you can get it. I am self employed. I do construction, maintenance, and work part time as a fill in announcer at a radio station and board operator for high school sports. Last week work was at a stand still just kind of waiting for a few jobs to start. It took me a whole week to realize I was kind of on vacation except for a few games to cover. So I took off for the cities for a nice visit with friends and family on Sunday. Monday rolls around and I am suddenly swamped with work at the radio station and maintenance work at the local hotel. Life sure is funny! Just when you think things are slowing down to a crawl, Your whole week fills up with opportunity to burnout the week like it was a day! in fact here is a picture of me hard at work at the last demo, i mean remodel that I did. I am the guy holding the ladder.

Check out the look on the little kid with the toy chainsaw"s face! He's thinking "thats right, I'm bad. Look what I just did!" And of course, like I said, I am hard at work. Jacking my jaw! I think the coffee cup is hidden in my other hand! Anyway, Sorry bout the shape of the picture. Its been floating around the old cosmic junk drawer since Christmas. Well, hope to continue this blogging streak I am in. Later!
Cosmic junkie

2008-02-20T18:03:00.000-08:00

So why exactly do I blog? or dont? I had this conversation with some friends and I still am a bit hazy on the answer. After a bit of searching my soul and a bit o' the grape, I realized that I might have something to say that someone else might find the least bit interesting. So I might have to start writing about things that really matter. Like senses of humor. And one of those friends said I have a good sense of humor but maybe funny to only those who know me. Sad but true. Its amazing how much a sense of humor, or lack of, can bring people together. Which brings me to the latest thing happening in my life. I recently received an email from an ex girlfriend. We are currently hanging out once in a while, texting everyday, and have exchanged Valentines Day cards. When I first met her I was immediately attracted to her! And after the short first meeting, I went home with my cheeks hurting from laughing so much! And things went great for a while, until she came to her senses! And because of her job and what not, couldnt see herself living out here in the sticks. Understandable. Its not for everyone. And I live about 3 hours from her. I hooked up with her again briefly 2 years later, and am not sure exactly why we lost touch, and that brings us to the present. The real killer is I havent met anyone since with her sharp witted, well read, intense personality. So when you date after meeting someone like this it makes it hard to find someone of that calibre once you have experienced it. And to top it all of, we are even on the same page spiritually and religiously! But the big thing is we play off each other beautifully! I can throw something out there and she will throw it right back, covered in wit! Thats hard to top! Sure, she's attractive, and that doesnt hurt, but its just amazing how we both agreed recently that when it comes to dating, we both realized its hard to find in that other person what we experienced with each other. Wow! If it doesnt work this time, I am so screwed!!!! Anyway, ex's withstanding, I think its amazing how much a joke or sense of humor, or just making someone laugh or smile, can make an instant connection! Sure, giving money or a really great piece of cake, cup of coffee, or a drink can bring people together easily also, but nothing beats making someone laugh! So hey, get out there, make someone smile or laugh! And if they dont laugh, well, laugh at them after they leave, and get on with your day! Just kidding! See, only some of you found that funny!

2007-12-25T19:04:00.000-08:00

Crap! I read a friend of mines blog and realized I had been tagged/linked, so I figured I better write something interesting since Thanksgiving! Christmas was a freaking blur this year. No, not too much scotch and brandy blur, I mean where did Christmas go blur! The idea of the birth of our Saviour is still very much intact, but do I really have to go back to work tomorrow? Come on!!!!!! it seems like just yesterday I was procrastinating shopping, and today it all came to fruition! Seriously though, I did have a great time connecting with friends again. I have been extremely busy for the last 6 months and realized lately I have been a bit of a stranger lately to friends and family lately. I have been working after hours and weekends on a trade sheetrock and construction project in exchange for a beautiful fully loaded 96 explorer that has had all the post 100,000 mile work done to it. In the immortal words of Ferris Bueller "it is so... choice!" in addition to my regular jobs of fill in guy at the local radio station, fill in guy for maintenance at the hotel, and working a normal barrage of "can you help me jobs", and committing the Cardinal sin of hanging out with an ex girfriend, I have stayed pretty busy. That reminds me, I am freakin tired, so... well, I will write more later. Take care and God bless you! Cosmic Junkie

2007-11-21T07:17:00.000-08:00

Howdy folks! Things are finally starting to settle down a bit. Except for all of this extra stuff that pulls away from the main goal of just plain getting the job done. It is all worth while stuff, though. Helping out the guy who has helped me so many times for once to do a few things around his house while he is recupping from a pacemaker put in. He is doing pretty well actually. Lots of other stuff filling up my off time. lions meetings. Lions bingo. Fundraisers. Traveling prophets. What was that last one you ask? Tom Stammen came to town for 3 nights, and this guy was amazing. He told me some stuff about me that he could never have guessed just from a handshake! Wow. If you get the chance to see this guy preach or just get prophesied over, do it. He is great! Just a regular joe like you or me who happens to have a clearer intuition than me. Well, bettr get to work. Cosmic junkie

2007-11-06T14:33:00.000-08:00

Well, I havent given up on blogging totally! Hi. hows it going. Me? Fine staying busy. Between filling in for a recuping boss, trying to get my own crap done, and pretty much trying to please everyone all the time, I havent killed myself or anyone. Yet. I will try to write more later. later! cosmic junkie.

2007-07-03T19:19:00.000-07:00

Thank you, Firefox. And Thank you Gette! I recently lost my beloved imac so in it's absence I had to borrow back the mac I gave my sister for her birthday. Then i tried to post but no go. Till Gette told me about Firefox. When I got MY new imac I downloaded it and here I am. Things are going pretty well now. After a rough patch any way. I dont want to spend to much time on this post incase it doesnt post for the 50th time and I end up freaking out and beating my new imac into submission. Here is my test post so wish me luck. Cosmic Junkie

2007-05-06T19:13:00.000-07:00

Weelllllllllllllll....
Quite a bit has happened since we last spoke. Sorry about not writing for so long as a lot of stuff has happened. the biggest and saddest news lately has surrounded a dughter of some freinds. After endless tests of trying to find out why their 8 year old daughter has been ailing so much lately, the worst has happened and the test came back showing leukemia. After her surgery and first dose of chemotherapy, she is up and about and came home tonight. She is quite a little trooper. they stopped by the church tonight during coffee club and was greeted by all her little friends. She seemed to be in good spirits. It is really great to see all her family, friends, and community rally around her to show support! And Mom and Dad seemed to be doing well. Gette really chronicled the whole ordeal a lot better than I ever could. The prognosis looks as good as can be expected so far!

My sister and her husband have found a great place to move to so I have been busy on the weekends helping to move them slowly but surely. They got squeezed out of their home due to a greedy city who slapped a huge overpriced assesment on their home because of a new curb and gutter system infront of the house and an even more greedy mortgage company who refused to work with them. Its kind of heartbreaking to see a great, peaceful, hardworking, salt of the earth family be painted into a corner with nly one option of leaving the home they have worked so hard for. But the good Lord never closes a door without opening a window. And this window happens to be out in the country with lots of rooms for their growing family and all kinds of land and outbuildings to explore for the kids! Its almost like a happy ending. They are really being great sports about the whole transition!

As I was helping them move last week, we threw a couple extra rocking chairs on the back of the trailer. As I was pulling a bungee cord across the back of the load, it slipped off and the end and struck me in the right eye. Damn thing got me dead center in the pupil at about a hundred miles an hour! Immediately after I covered it with my hand making sure it didnt fall out, and after my brother in law told me it was still in there, I tried to keep working, but my vision kept failing till it was just a cloudy, milky mess to look through. I put some ice on it but it didnt get any better. After calling the clinic on a Sunday, it was off to the emergeny room for me! Thats when it really started hurting! In my wallet! 250 bucks just to have some drops and have a doctor shuffle me off to an even more expensive opthamologist the next day! And this guy looked at me for 2 minutes and told me to stay off it for a few weeks, and not to lift anything over 40 pounds. Made the construction job really interesting. Painting and doing sheetrock with one good eye and and one blurry one. Long ass week, let me tell ya! The real fun was have my pupil dialated for a week. I looked like a doped out freak! Anyway, My pupil and vision are finally getting back to normal. Thank God for an understanding boss who was able to find work for me.

I head a small fledgling youth group who are trying to go to church camp. We are currently in pursuit of a little extra funding to take it easy on the pocketbook of the hardworking parents of the kids who need to come up with half the cost, as the church comes up with the other half. So far the kids have been fairly helpful in doing some yard work for donations. They are actually working together pretty well so far. Sometimes trying to keep them on task instead of screwing around and playing around too much is like herding cats, but its to be expected with teenagers. Their enthusiasm is really great, though. I am kind of proud of the little buggers! In fact, They asked me the other night, "can we give our donations to Nina and her family instead of going towards the church camp fund?" I told them that was a really nice sentiment but they should ask Pastor Bob. He told them to wait and see because they might end up with more money than they need for camp. Good answer, Bob!

Well, thats just a sample of whats going on lately. The major stuff, anyway. I better crash out, though, another big week starting tomorrow. Take care!

2007-04-15T17:49:00.000-07:00

Twins win!!!! I had the pleasure of hanging out with a few friends and my Dad at a great Twins game last night. A good time was had by all. Here is a good shot of our seats.
Not too shabby huh?
It was kind a long day for everyone. We used ipastor's vangina because we could get everyone in it. Thanks again, man! I still get comp tickets from the radio station I used to work at. So I brought ipastor, daughter of ipastor, my no account brother in law, Craig, and my Dad. Here is a picture of no account brother in law (said with love, of course), Me, and my Dad. Striking family resemblance between me and Dad, huh? (On a side note the most white trash thing heard this last Christmas was from my half sister when after Dad and I were done taking a picture together, she said in her best newfound North Carolina accent, "Sure can tell you two are related. Y'all got the same teeth missing and everything!" True story.

After the game, ipastor, daughter, and I left the Stadium and ended up losing the rest of the gang for about five minutes. Just enough time to call their cell phone and no luck, except for getting one daughter who probably still thinks her father is still lost in a strip club. Sorry... I couldnt help myself. Anyway, the Twins are doing fairly decent so far this year. Ya win some, ya lose some. I am just happy to have gotten to taste a Famous Dave's dog again this year! It's like six pounds of meat! WOW! freakin awesome! It's also 6 bucks, but some things are worth it!

Well, thats it for now. Have a great day. Your friend in left field, Cosmic Junkie

2007-04-08T18:55:00.000-07:00

Hey, ya darn kids, Happy Easter to ya! I hope all is well. My weekend went pretty well. Tings were starting out kinda rocky on Friday. I was driving home after work and getting groceries, and there was some pretty clear clanging under the hood of the Ranger, so I stopped into the my mechanics who lives right before my turn off to go home. After getting my Jeep out of the shop and back on the road just a few days before, I felt a little skiddish about stopping in again for a rousing game of "guess that death rattle" and it was almost a coin toss if I should just go home instead. Well, it was a goood call, because we were both able to witness the death of the alternator. Since they wanted a couple hundred for a rebuilt and the truck itself is worth only a few hundred more, it became apparent that I would just pick one up at the junkyard and slap it on on Monday. So I called Boss and he picked me up and brought me home. And this stupid cold and cough just keeps hanging on. Crap. Anyway, Saturday morning I started out for the morning with the Jeep, picked up my tools out of the defunct truck, got some gas and the stupid Jeep wouldnt start again at the gas station. After a jump start from a buddy I was back on the road. Once again, friends came through! I went to check out the work needed on a friends house he is trying to sell, and it was too cold to do any sealing so I went and picked up a new alternator at the junkyard. I stopped in to see my grandpa at the nursing home but he was at lunch, so I visited with my uncle and Grandma. Then it was on to the next town to see my sister and her family and help them move a few loads of stuff to their new house. Then it was on the road for another hour to back home. Thank God today was just Church and Easter dinner at a friends house. Overall, not a bad weekend. Hope yours was good also! have a nice day!

2007-03-28T18:06:00.000-07:00

Spring is officially here. And I can tell by sleeping crappy for the last week. Something about this time of year gets me every time. The good news is it never lasts long.
But thats not why I have asked you all together here tonight. I need to discuss a serious problem. Sampling. Its been around for a long time now. Sampling affects a lot of people. And a lot of people think they can sample and get away with it with no repurcussions. Now I'm not here to tell you if its wrong or not, but some people abuse the right to sample with complete abandon. Take this story for example. I have a good friend of mine who owns a bakery/cafe. Just recently a new customer came up and complained to him that although his samples were very moist and delicious there were not enough of them and that she had eaten them all. he asked her what samples and she told him the lemonpoppy muffin samples on the counter. He had no idea what she was talking about until after another few minutes passed and he realized what happened. Two of his usuals, a mother and her son, were there earlier, and had put there empty baskets that hold the orders up on the counter after finishing. And this lady feasted on the nice moist crumbs of the other customers autistic son! So the next time you go for that free sample, ask yourself "self, where has this sample been?" Well, bon apetite'!

2007-03-04T18:05:00.000-08:00

Man, I get one snowplow stuck, and they tell me I cant plow snow next year!

Seriously though, this is how rough the storm was around here this week. This is winter in Minnesota all you spoiled little "under 10 inches of snow" whiners! Even snowplows are getting stuck! Well, this weekend went pretty well. I shoveled part of the day on Saturday, and today, was hanging out with friends at church. And I took in "Ghost Rider". I cant compare it to the old comic book cause I dont remember it, but I liked it a lot! A good friend of mine has a blog with lots of great snow info also. I should go and get a few things done. Just wanted to share this great pic and blog site of Gette's. have a good nite! Mark

2007-03-03T06:41:00.000-08:00

Well, the big storm is over, and as you see here, there is plenty of digging out to do. Crap. Normally, I like to exercise in a nice warm dry environment, but you gotta mix it up a little bit once in a while.

Good to see the suns finally out though. I sure do miss the Jeep. Nothing like having a 4wd vehicle ... in the shop. Stupid clogged cooling system. Stupid me for not getting it in and out of the mechanic before all of this snow. It only took me a half hour of digging yesterday to get out to go to work. Not too bad. Could be worse. It could look like the back yard!

Nothing much new is going on. Boss and I have been working on putting a furnace in one of his rentals. At least three times a day I would still kill for a smoke. And the cats have been sucessfully dewormed. And I heard Pioneer public tv is hiring for a production/editor guy. Not sure about the exact title, a friend told me about it. I will probably check that out. Ooooooooo. How freaking exciting can this guy's life get? I cant stand the suspense! What will happen next? Will I win the lottery? Get a girlfriend? Get my Jeep back and have it run decent for a while? Life sure can be boring, sometimes. Sorry, but thats all I got for you folks. Just hopefully getting one last blast of winter. We have still been pretty spoiled this year. One week of storms really, and a ton of snow. In a normal year we get plenty o' stormage! Well, best get to finding other stuff to do than shovel! Later!

2007-02-24T18:08:00.000-08:00

Thanks to the threat of bad weather, and the cold I caught not slowing me down anymore, I really got some crap done in the last few days. I tried to get the Jeep up and running for the 4wd yesterday. It seems to have some sort of blockage, perhaps a bad thermostat. So that will go in the shop. And today I had the time and energy to crack open the new used washer and see why it was leaking. After a while I tracked down the problem to where it was leaking through some sort of areation tube on the water supply hose before it gets to the washer drum. It had something to do with where if you wanted to reuse the suds. I dont. To make a long story short, I cut out that part and just joined it with some plastic hose and clamps I found around the house. Works sweet! and the good news is, if I screw it up, I have some good friends who have a spare in their basement. She even said I could see if it works right there! Damn, they're going to spoil me! I even re-de-wormed the cats today. once again, Thank you Gette! You can see whats up today by checking her out at http://goosesauce.blogspot.com/

You know, Its easy to forget about the classics till you are staying home all day on a Saturday because of weather. Back to the future 1, 2, and 3 are on tv today. Awesome! Freaking Awesome! ABC Family actually has some pretty decent stuff. But hey, dont get me wrong, I am as interested as the next guy on the continuing saga of Anna Nicole Smith's exciting life... I mean death. So I will will keep E! on the handy recall button, just in case I need a fix. Hey, is it just me or should the judge in the case get on some sort of anti emotional drug. Impartial, my ass! Sorry, they were talking about it on the news this morning and I just had to agree.

We had a first run movie shown at church last night. It was all right. Not too bad. Pretty good story about a football team and coach who decide to give God their all, and wouldnt ya know it, it worked out pretty good for them! I dont want to spoil it for you, though. The movie is called "Facing the Giants" Ya really cant lose giving the Big Guy all the credit! Ya know I was even thinking about it the other day. Its amazing how many excuses people use to not believe in God. They get all caught up in "There are so many discrepancies in the Bible" and "I dont need to go to church." The thing that really hit me though was ... What's the worse that could happen to ya if it wasnt true? What do you have to lose? Do you think if you are a whole hearted believer and you died, went to heaven, met God, and he just looked at you and said "Ha, sucker! I so got you good! You were all like I believe, I believe! Come on in anyway, Puddin' head!" Not too bad, huh? It's a lot better than the alternative. And not believing. And being wrong. Yikes.

2007-02-19T17:10:00.000-08:00

Some days it sucks to be me. This was pretty much my day. I'm not complaining, but... This morning I woke up at 4 freakin' 11 am so I could join a friend at the gym, got there a half hour later, worked out, got to the hotel to a big fat leak in the ceiling, left it for the real professionals, did some other maintenance stuff, went to the big box store 45 minutes away with Boss, came back, put some ceiling tile in after the leak, helped boss drop a bunch of stuff at his house. And that wasnt a half bad day. This is where it turned into a really bad day. I went home. I found out quickly that my one cat still has worms. You figure out how. I tried to put that outta my mind and deal with that later. I bought a new, used washer a few days ago and finally had time to put it in! Excited about putting in my new, used, washer, I started right away. I hauled it into my bedroom. You might think that's weird, it being in my bedroom and all, but its better than the kitchen. To make a long story short, none of the holes lined up, no matter how hard I stretched the water hoses! Same thing with the drain line. I got the damn washer as tight as I could to the wall, and trying to make my big fat hands put the hoses on while its up against the wall! Mhw !2&*&*^^$fuc@&^&87 washer and whatnot came out of my mouth faster than the cats could run for cover! I immediately cursed myself for becoming a nonsmoker! 4 and a half months without a damn camel almost went up in a puff of smoke if I lived any closer to town. I seriously believe I was being tested folks! Anyway, an hour later, and 4 new bigger holes in the wall, I have it all hooked up, leveled, and water rushing in like a champ, and I am praying for a miracle, because the old owner said it might not drain water right away. That was the least of my problems. It didnt even fu#$^$$ng move... at all! much less drain! So I got it unhooked, on the dolly, tipped it back, careful not to leak anywater through the house, and things are looking good till I got it in the living room and it gets caught on the rug. Yep, you guess it, water spilling all over. Thank God I had plenty of dirty towels around to sopp it up! I finally get it outside and decide, hey, I'll just tip it over here and it will make it easier to load in the truck. My decision was quicker than my fingers and they got smashed between a washer filled with 10 gallons of water, dolly, and concrete. LOL, yeah, guess who lost! My finger. Actually just half the fingernail. So I get to keep a trophy... a fuc%^i#ng memento if you will. A smoke sure would have gone good right about now. It became pretty clear that this many things going wrong was truly testing my faith. I kept planning in my mind how I would drop this washer off in town and go get a pack of smokes. Then I would shoot down the plan and decide to drop it off tomorrow. So I am still a pretty pissed off nonsmoker, but I would like to thank you for reading my story. It helps me cope just writing about it and getting it all out there. I aint perfect. No where near it. And at least 4 to 5 times a day I seriously think about going back on my promise to God not to smoke anymore. The good side is, besides my being a hell of a lot healthier, and not being a slave to some nicotine slinging, government ass kissing, "playing by the rules", cancer providing, smooth tobacco supplier, I can breath a little easier knowing that I got through one more day without putting another nail in my coffin. The funny thing is, I will probably die from a washer falling on me from the back of a truck tomorrow!

2007-02-13T18:20:00.000-08:00

Happy Valentines Day to all you folks who have significant others. I do not. Again. This sucks. Nuff said. Anyway, I felt it was time to mix things up. So what do you think of the new template? I hope its not all business looking. But the old junk drawer was starting to look like this.

My visit to my sisters church was great! Even their kids really dug all the singing! I had a pretty good time visiting there. I think they are coming to visit my church this week. Should be pretty cool! Thanks again to Gette for covering for me during yoot groop last Sunday.

I am kind of excited for this weekend for the big race too. I am having some fellow race fans over for the Daytona 500 on Sunday. Tacos and racing. Hopefully a good combination.

The weather has been great the last few days. A balmy above zero 3 day streak will probably end tomorrow though. It was nice for a while but all good things must come to an end. And so does this entry. I am suddenly just dog assed tired. Must be all that turkey I am still chowing on. Ask my cats though, its tasty. Well, nite.

2007-02-09T18:38:00.000-08:00

Man, if your going to survive a crazy Minnesota winter, buy a wood or corn stove. I tell ya. I would be so screwed lately if I didnt have that wood stove. Its awesome during cold weather! heats half the house! Its been like 2weeks of sub zero weather, and I have freinds who have beeen going through the propane like crazy. And put your faucets on a permanent drip. Frozen pipes suck.

Oh, and get pets without communicable diseases. I had to deworm my cats a few nights ago. Its kind of cool how easy you can get rid of worms. Just a spoonful of pink liquid in their food and its done. It was pretty handy stuff. I borrowed it from a freind. I fed it to them in some turkey, just to ensure they ate it all. As smart as you might think a cat is, they didnt stop once from eating and look at me like " hey, this turkey tastes funny." Nope, just kept on chowing. Problem solved.

I tell ya, thank God for good friends! They have really been coming through lately. for example. I have been blessed lately with Inside jobs again and friends who provide them. Winter can really suck for handymen, and people in the maintenance and construction people. In the handyman field "an inside job" is always good news in the winter. Thank you Lord. Things slowed down a bit with "boss" so a few friends put me to work on their homes.

And thats about it for whats been going on lately. I am going to check out my sisters church on Sunday, so a good friend is covering for me in yoot group. Thanks Gette.

2007-01-29T18:43:00.000-08:00

No, seriously, what the hell is wrong with me.

The strangest stuff makes me laugh. I walk through a dark room to get to the kitchen, my foot hits something slightly firm, it meows really loud, and I see a black fuzzy blur shooting off to under the nearest chair, and I start laughing my ass off! Most folks would probably say sorry and comfort the offended feline, but I couldnt think of anything but how my cat cant seem to stay out of my big lumbering way when he's the one with the see in the dark superpowers! Unless he was sleeping. Then its still his own damn fault for sleeping in the middle of the floor. Stupid cat. Simple, stupid, funny cat. Hes 14 and still thinks something jumpy on a string is still fun. And hes the smart cat. the other one still reminds me of Patrick on Spongebob.
One of the other many things is I belong to a family who thinks static electricity is good clean fun. I was hanging out with my sister, her husband, and three kids and we start talking about static electricity and how if you sit on a certain couch in their house, rub your feet on the floor, and touch the kid with all the hair (as you see below) without touching the couch, you will actually hear the hair crackle and get a bit of a spark if you turn the light off. No one gets hurt, everyone gets a good laugh, and a free science lesson!

So I am pretty sure i have a really twisted sense of humor but the good thing is I know I am not alone. I hope.

2007-01-20T18:25:00.000-08:00

Wanted: One dependable workout partner.

Size, shape, ethnicity, gender... none of it matters. You just have to show up. This month 3 people said they would help me stay focused and accountable by agreeing to workout with me. I have only worked out with one of them and then there was a scheduling/family conflict wich I can understand. I am not dissappointed with any of them, I am just saying its hard to stay on course when it seems your the only one serious about it. Because of all this, I am starting to lose interest myself. I was doing pretty good for awhile. Now, well, as I was writing this, the cat is eating pizza crumbs he found off my gut. So now I am bringing the cat down to my cholesterol laden level. Great. All bitching and whining aside though, things are going allright.My two small jobs brought me two bigger jobs. Can't beat that! Life is good. I have to go to my new nephews baptism tomorrow morning. Get together with family. Eat a buffet with them all later. Crap. See what I mean?

2007-01-16T18:06:00.000-08:00

Well, I am back from a week in the Twin cities and am working on a few small jobs here. Ahhh, it was great to visit with freinds while I was up there, but its also good to be back. I even thought I had Directv hooked up yesterday but I was mistaken. I bought it and 3 more recievers from my buddy who had recently switched to cable. I hooked them up and even got a signal AND programming! so I was hesitant to call to get it put in my name right away. I, instead, went to work and came back later to find no more free programming. Bummer. So much for riding free radio waves for a while. anyway, It was too late call so I will just do it tomorrow. Today, I called and got bounced around Directv central like anyone would. After finally landing in the call center from Hell, I end up with Miss Slack-jaw-yokle. And the conversation goes like this.

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: Hello, my name is Miss Slack-jaw-yokle. Your phone number and account number please?

Me: My phone number is 3..0.72...4....0... and the account number is 294857-75-267-76-56969886965, but its the old owners account number. See I bought it from him and set it up at my house. Its working, I have a good signal, and even had some free programming already, Ha Ha! I just want to get the service connected, account in my name and a new plan. And the gal I was talking to before sent me to you to buy a new card.

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: And the old owners name?

Me: Craig Jf;f;j;jsiririrg...

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: So your at the same address as him, just put in your name then?

Me: (Laughing. Deep breath. Relax) No, I bought it from him and I just want to get the service connected, account in my name and a new plan. I live about 20 miles away from him. She said I just need to buy a new card!

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: Oh, I cant sell you a new card on a used system. We cant connect service on a used system.

Me: What? But it was working after I hooked it up! I had a signal and programming. All I need is to get the service connected.

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: No, I'm sorry sir. We cant connect a new customer with used equipment. You cant use used equipment.

Me: Well, thats why they sent me to you, to give me a new computer card. Cant you just give me a new card?

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: Its used equipment. We cant set up new customers on used equipment! You cant use used equipment!

Me: But it was working! I watched half of Brothers Grimm on encore and then I had to leave. When I came back, it was off!

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: I'm sorry sir, but we cant.

Me: But it was working, already! Ya know, I used to have dish network, and then sold it to a friend of my mine. He didnt have to by a new card or anything. Just put it in his name.

Miss Slack-jaw-yokle: The only way a new customer can use used equipment is if they lease or buy a reciever and then add an additional recever. Then they can use a used receiver for one of the extra receivers. We currently have an offer to give you the dish and up to 4 receivers free. Would you like to go ahead and sign up for that today?

Me: (By now, laughing my ass off) Naw, thats okay, Lady, I think I will go ahead and go back to dish network! Life was a lot simpler and easier with them! I sure would like to thank you for your time, though! And your HEEEEEELP!

So, thats just the part of the conversation I can remember! I dont know if she was full of crap, tired, didnt want to take another call or what, but after that there is no way I am going with those guys. Screw that! If I have this much trouble with dish I quite possibly will freak out. And thats pretty much my night. I get 3 channels witha booster antennae out here in the sticks. And it all depends on the weather. I am out in the country so there is no cable to speak of and computer is dial up. It kind of like camping when all your friends are staying in a 4 star hotel. Sure, its fun for a while...

2007-01-05T16:10:00.000-08:00

I have decided to make this the year. Make some changes. get over this continuing slothlike behavior I find myself slowly settling into. At the start of the year I thought " Hey, I quit smoking, started working out again, I am just going to keep doing this into 2007." So far I have just noticed myself getting kind of lazy. I watched mallrats over the Holidays and I really dig the part where Jay yells to Silent Bob "Fly, Fat Ass, Fly!" as he is about to go to battle with the single lynchpin that holds the whole stage together that their mission is to disassemble. In fact, I am seriously thinking of making this my slogan. Yeah, I think we will go with that for a while.

2006-12-28T21:14:00.000-08:00

Thirteen Things from my junk drawer

1 a broken Barenaked Ladies tape

2. 2 back up lights for a 1996 ranger (one good, one bad)

3. an instant handwarmer

4. a white drawer handle I stole from Kyle of Firestormfilms

5. clothespins

6. a mousetrap (I have cats now)

7. a dirty fork (beats washing it)

8. a toothbrush

9. a free Camel chain bottle opener. (still in the box, you collectors!)

10. film negatives of people I dont recognize

11. a fiberglass gasket

12. a ketchup packet from Dairy Queen

13. half of a phone cord

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2006-12-25T20:38:00.000-08:00

No animals were harmed in the making of this Christmas Day blog. But all the other victims will be vegetables. As shown in the photo, it looks like reconstructive surgery is all that can save Mrs Potatohead now. Horrible accident. Just horrible. Worse than that whole Humpty Dumpty incident a while back. Thank God for the trusty, confident hands of intern surgeon Elijah Fisher. Sure he's young, but what skill! See that look of determination? Actually, thats more like the watchful eye of a kid whose sister is about to get into his huge cache of new toys!

What a great day! I got there just in time for food! And they made a great batch of chili. I just had another bowl a minute ago. Leftovers! Thanks Sis! I pity da fool who works with me after 3 bowls of Goooooooood Chili! My Dad and his other family made it later, gifts were passed, and everyone had a great time. Every one loved the film to dvd gift of old family movies I gave this year. And I got a lot of great quality playtime with the kids. I still cant believe how fast they grow up. The twins were enjoying the plastic velcro cover on the box more than the actual gift last year, this year they seemed to enjoy the gift more than the wrapping. Go figure! Got some great gifts myself this year. A really cool picture from Georgette . Thanks again! An incredible break in price on the film to dvd's. Thanks Kyle at Firestormfilms! A Dewalt 14.4 volt qick charge drill set from Boss! Thanks Bob! Clothes from Ma! (you're never too old!) A couple gift cards, and my first matching coffee cup set. Thanks Steve! I'm somebody! Pretty fancy, till I get more than four people over for coffee, then someones getting the big plastic Citgo travel mug. Well, its back to work tomorrow, so I better shut up and crash. Merry Christmas and Happy New year!

2006-12-25T08:37:00.000-08:00

Happy Christmas to you. Merry Hanukah, Happy kwanzaa. My buddy called and wished me a Happy Festivus. Seinfeld fans. We'll never die. However you celebrate the holidays, I wish you well. And now Happy New Year. Hmmmm. Time seems to be clipping right along, huh.

Ahhhhhhh, what a great morning. Thank you Lord for another day. And for sending Jesus to wash away my sins. Due to time and content restraints, we wont go in to them today. , Although, 2007 is wide open, I see. And thank you to all my friends and family for being so damn cool. Yesterday went to church, hungout with some good friends discussing a good title for some 8mm movies that Firestormfilms put to dvd for me. We finally decided on Denson Fuzzy Memories. I then went home, watched a bunch of movies, (Mallrats... remember mallrats? Fly, Fat ass, fly! Classic!) pigged out, surfed way too much, and was able to just hang out and do my own thing on Christmas Eve instead of getting sucked into someone elses personal, family get together. It's all about space, folks. I am a single guy. Everyone deserves their own Christmas. Even single people. Thats why I have such cool family and friends. Cause they get it. Now TODAY, well thats just a plain different story! I am getting ready to go to my sisters, visit with the whole damn family, eat too much, eat too much again, open gifts, wrestle with the kids, and end up doing the nice long famous Minnesota goodbye at the door. In case you dont know what the Minnesota Goodbye is, It goes as such, thanks to the urbandictionary.com. " The act applying to most Minnesotants while visiting others in which, when one person has to leave, they proceed to talk for another hour, then the departing party is walked to the front door, where they talk for another hour, then the departing party gets walked to their car while the host family talks to them through the car window for an hour, and finally the departing couple SLOWLY departs down the drive, yelling back & forth with the host family." That about wraps it up. We'll see ya later, den. Oh, wait, one more thing I was gonna ask ya...

2006-12-21T07:21:00.000-08:00

Thirteen Things about The Cosmic Junkie

1…. I am a new nonsmoker

2. I am left handed, and still cant find a decent lefthanded support group

3. I have 2 cats named Norman and Toby

4. Hate it when cats stare at me. They're on to me.

5. live out in the country

6. Am a slob.

7. I am thankful I live out in the country because I am a slob.

8. I am addicted to good, STRONG, coffee!

9. I am single.

10. I am an iMac fan.

11. I really dig science fiction.

12. I am having a hard time getting into the Christsmas Spirit this year.

13. I cant believe it took me this long to come up with 13 things.

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2006-12-18T07:16:00.000-08:00

Duh! I just heard about this coal to liquid fuel that apparently can solve all of our fuel problems... and has been around since the twenties. Come on! Why do we sit on this information forever? And then Bush is of course now yelling "OOO! OOO! I was just going to say coal to liquid is the answer! We are already flying planes with this stuff. Wow. Seems like it would run a car pretty well, huh?

Check this out from www.futurecoalfuels.org/security.asp. it says " In his State of the Union Address, President Bush acknowledged the growing energy challenge confronting the United States by setting a national goal of replacing 75 percent of U.S. energy imports from the Middle East by 2025. The Energy Policy Act of 2005 encouraged the development of alternative fuels such as coal-to-liquid (CTL) fuels and coal-derived natural gas substitutes, but its modest incentives are far too timid a response to today's stark realities.

For a forceful response to the energy challenge, the U.S. must make greater use of its unrivalled coal reserves — to provide significant new supplies of clean CTL fuels, to enhance oil and coal bed methane recovery and to produce ethanol.

The U.S. has 27 percent of world coal supply — the largest of any country — but less than 2 percent of the world's oil and less than 3 percent of its natural gas. By contrast, Iran and Russia together possess almost half of the world's supply of natural gas.

Production of coal-derived liquid fuels would expand potential uses of America's nearly 250 billion tons of recoverable coal reserves beyond electricity generation to help reduce our reliance on foreign sources of oil, while promoting national security and providing for sustained economic growth.

With coal reserves and production dispersed widely among more than two dozen states, the U.S. boasts a geographic diversity of domestic fuel supply that is less susceptible to natural disasters and terrorist threat.

Producing CTL fuel does not depend on unproven technology nor require extensive R&D. China is already building a $2 billion CTL plant that will begin using its coal reserves in the fall of 2007, and plans to build many more.

Moreover, U.S. coal reserves cannot be nationalized by a foreign government, require no costly armed forces to protect, nor costly exploration efforts to discover.

Establishing a goal of producing at least 300,000 barrels of high-grade fuel per day by 2015 using CTL technology is a feasible target. This is equivalent to the amount of transportation fuel consumed daily by the U.S. military for domestic operations. In fact, military and commercial aviation are promising early markets. The Department of Defense is already studying the advantages of CTL fuels to serve our armed forces on the ground and in the air.

For these reasons, CTL fuels are among the most practical, promising answers to greater energy security for the United States."

Of course, now just wait for all the arguing and bickering to start while we still get raped every time we fill up. They wont do anything on this for years. My question is, if its already been around since the 20's, how come we havent done more with it yet? Probably because they are not done milking the big fat oily cash cow yet.

2006-12-07T09:57:00.000-08:00

Yikes! Its December already. A week into it already. Suddenly we are reaching 2 below at night. Work has tapered off considerably. And the cats really dont spend much time outside anymore (unless they exhibit really bad timing and decision making as they rush outside in the morning with me, forgetting the next time they will see inside is nighttime. Curiousity freezes the cat). These are just a few of the signs that you will probably will not be doing any gardening anytime soon.

I have really been going through the wood lately, also. During the winter, I try to use my woodburning stove as much as possible. Last year I only went through one tank of propane in the winter, so it helps out considerably. I spent part of yesterday and today splitting wood. Its good exercise too. Its amazing how quick you can start sweating outside when its freezing if you just put your lats into it. And when you see steam coming off yourself, its pretty cool! I remember cutting wood in the fall with my stepfather as a kid. Its pretty comical now, but kinda scary at the time. He liked to keep plenty of antifreeze in him while cutting wood. Combine that with a chainsaw and a nervous teenage boy, and you got yourself some good times, friend! Working with a drunk lumberjack sure hones your catlike reflexes, and teaches you how to drive a stickshift truck in a pinch.

Got some good news at the doctors this week, my good cholesterol is up. I have been exercising, quit smoking, and started taking fish oil supplements. Except for the smelly salmon burps when I am talking to somebody, Its been doing me some good! Thank God I always have gum or tic tacs with me now. They pull double duty now. To cut the urges and to cover up the stink fumes coming outta my mouth occasionally. Sure would kill for a Camel once in a while, but the nonsmoking just went over the 2 month mark. Feels like 6, though. Not one stinking cigarette, though. Usually by this time, I would have cheated myself right up to a pack a day again. Well, gotta get back to the cutting of the wood. Goodbye internet.
Cosmic Junkie

2006-11-28T19:29:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine bought a gym a few months ago, and i decided that was a good enough sign to quit NOT using my Golds gym power cage upstairs at home, and buy a gym membership that I will not use instead. But actually, I have been averaging 2- 3 times a week for thew past few months! Funny thing about getting back in the gym. I quit trying to lose weight a couple of months ago, and decided instead of making my gut smaller, I would make it LOOK smaller by making the rest of me look Bigger. And its actually working! Normally a wild assed plan like this is just an excuse to go back to a quieter, lazier, t.v. packed, more sedentary way of life. but not this time, friend! All kidding aside, though, once I get back into it, I really do enjoy working out. I dig the results. And hell, one of these days somebody might even accuse me of looking like I excercise! One of these days. And the cool thing is if I eat too much or the wrong stuff, I can just call it fuel and burn it off later. I even did crunches today. Them suckers hurt! And i realized today that I am not pretty while doing crunches. With my legs in the air bent at the knees, I look like a spastic, dying bug blasted with Blag Flag spray. This gym is great! Its never packed, and sometimes I am the only one there. That reminds me, I should probably wash that towel. And the really cool thing is that by the time New years rolls around, I will be way ahead of everyone and be already forgetting about getting in shape this year.

2006-11-25T06:36:00.000-08:00

Man, I am slipping. I forgot to rant about yesterdays excursion through commercialism. The hotel we do maintenance at had one of their waterheaters die. And of course, it happened when they are packed full of people for the big holiday weekend. So it looks like a trip to Menards because nobody here has commercial water heaters in stock. The boss needed me, and my pickup, to go to BigBoxTown early to beat the black friday rush. So we get to Menards at 6 freakin a.m., and we cant find a parking spot! There are people parked over the curb, and on the grass! All to save a couple bucks on a Skil saw! I dropped Boss off and circled like a vulture preying on limping Toyotas just trying to get to the main road. I finally para-sighted a spot opening up at the garden center and backed in, much to the dismay of the other jackals around me. I sat waiting for Boss to call me and let me know if he got one. Man, I sure regretted quitting smoking! I did find a fingernail that needed some chewing though. After about 20 minutes I get out to see if he was at the exit or check out or close to being done. As I get to the back of the truck, the fella in the next car yells at me "Hey man, I know your sitting there waiting on whoever you're waiting on, and you have probably seen as much of all this crazy shit as I have." "Yeah," I said. "check this out for 30 seconds and tell me what you think. Just listen for thirty seconds." "Allright. Sure!" was all I said, thinking whatever this is, its got to be more entertaining than watching near misses in the parking lot and listening to christmas songs on the radio. Stupid radio stations. So he starts spitting out the dopest rymes, g. All about how people are sucked up in shopping for stuff we dont need when theres people starving. I gave him more than 30 seconds. I was pretty impressed. I cant put 2 sentences together without throwing in an Uhhhh... or ummmm... What he was rapping about was pretty good. And I told him so. then he started telling how he wants to be heard and how he's white just like Eminem and how Eminems birthday is October 17th, and his is on October 16th, and thats got to mean something, right? Probably not. Anyway I didnt answer him on that one. Then he starts telling me way too much about his past, then I start thinking, "wackjob!". I shouldnt, but I did. Sorry Menards parking lot rapping guy. My bad. Anyway, Boss called my cell phone, I met him at the exit, we went around back, picked it up, and went to work, everything was swell. And then this morning I started thinking "Ha! Christmas rapping! Free! Free Christmas rapping at Menards!" Ha! LOL! Did somebody pull my leg? Where are the hidden cameras? Is this some kind of joke? Noooo, its not. he is right. Too much time spent on shopping and not enough on just plain giving of yourself. So its OK to start the season early. Not with early sales. Early giving of yourself. Wether its your time or blankets to Goodwill. So, thanks, and once again, sorry Menards parking lot rapping guy. Good job. He gets it. Well, thats about it. I better get off the computer and get something done today.

2006-11-24T17:07:00.000-08:00

I was happy to see Thanksgiving roll around so I could see this little guy again. here is the newest addition to the family. My younger sisters first kid, anyway. Matthew Sparks. Hes the quiet one. So far. And hasnt quite started chowing on pink jelo fluff yet. Maybe next year. A great time was had by all.

This picture shows exactly why living in central Minnesota during holiday travel is no big deal. Not a car in sight! And at 11 am on Thangsgiving Day! It only took an hour to go a little over 50 miles to my sisters house. It started out a pretty nice relaxing morning.

Then I got to my sisters and all that changed! I'm not complaining, though. Man, as soon as I got there, there were rugrats underfoot and ready to play for hours! No napping post turkus inhalus this year! Little suckers were all over me like a bad suit. Ready to play "cars and trucks". But first, the feast! Plenty to eat. Lots of great food. My younger sister brought her pink jello fluff... about 7 pounds of it. I brought a pie, and my older sister and her family provided the rest. After I wore out my welcome I headed home and stopped in at a freinds house for pie... and a few plates of food. Man, didnt have any trouble catching some sleep last night. I really should lay off the deviled eggs, though. and pie. and stuffing. and pretty much food altogether for the next few days. Well, hope you have a great Thanksgiving weekend! Later!

2006-11-21T15:49:00.000-08:00

Ha! Check me out! It looks like I just got an idea! I finally got around to throwing a photo on here! I should put one on the profile, but hey, one thing at a time. Other than that nothing much to write about. Everything is swell.

2006-11-20T17:31:00.000-08:00

Its a Charlie Brown Thangsgiving. Maaaannnn, everytime I see this special it just takes me back to simpler times. Sharing pumpkin pie with Snoopy and Woodstock. Goood times. I never had to worry about getting a good napping spot or if just bringing cranberries equals taking 6 pounds of leftovers home. Have you ever noticed noone ever worries if they got any mashed potatos leftovers? I think its cause when noones around, gravy goes with everything. Cool! A brand spanking new Charlie brown special just came on. "He's a bully Charlie Brown". Damn, charlie Brown got tough. Go get em, Chuck! Gotta watch this, hold on. Hey, I'm gonna try one of these newfangled paragraph breaks all the cool kids are doing nowadays.

Ha, "the bachelor" is on. Its amazing how fast some women will fight over and say they love a guy with a castle. Cool.

Tortilla chips sure are delicious.

I prefer disposable razors to electric ones, but will still use an electric one in a pinch.

I borrowed one of those squeegees for windows like they have at the gas station. Its works really great for house windows! I dont know why people bitch about doing windows! That reminds me. I should really bring that back to the gas station.

Quitting smoking is hard. Dont do it kids! (I should practice my public service announcement in case anything comes from that whole gas station thing.) I have been a non smoker for over a month and a half so far! It reeeaaally sucks. I still miss it quite a bit sometimes, but it is a lot easier now. And I do feel awesome.

Have you seen that new Burger King commercial where the parents are whining to the kid to pleeeeeeeeeaaaaase bring them to Burger King? Its freaking hilarious!

Man, I am really digging this paragraph break thing! Makes me look like I wrote a book or something. In fact, I am really going to have to start talking like this. Ha!

I bid you Good day!

2006-11-19T12:17:00.000-08:00

Hot time in the big town last night, I tell ya! I got to be a bingo caller at Lions bingo last night. I was a little nervous to start just because before we got started I found out it was kind of ritualistic. I thought I just belted out numbers and letters. Nope. You have announcements and use actual bingo lingo. and for some reason noone thought it was funny when I told them they could buy a lucky card for another quarter. I guess bingo is a pretty serious game. Before I got ahold of the game, anyway. I also almost lost one of the little round bingo balls. I caught it before it landed in the lemon bars for sale below the table so i averted a small crisis. And the fella who I handed the bingo balls (sounds like a condition you get when you spend too much time at the bingo hall, doesnt it?) to, kept grabbing my thumb instead of the ball. I was wondering why until I put my thumb in the tray and sure enough, it fit perfectly. And the real funny thing is for the bake sale held previous to the bingo game, the Lions asked me to bring a pan of bars to sell. Well, to anyone seasoned in a kitchen, thats no big deal. But for me, they might as well asked me to balance the country's deficit problem... and to show my work. I dont know how to make bars! I'm a freaking idiot around flour and a cake pan! but I did hear how easy rice crispy bars are, so I tried them. And no self respecting bachelor worth his weight in prepackaged microwaveable food wouldnt wait till an hour before bingo to make it. Cuz they said it only takes 5 minutes. YEAH... to find and wash the pans! It took me about 45 minutes and I had to google rice krispie bars! Everything turned out pretty well I must say. And the kitchen fire went out with a little bit of baking soda. Just kidding, no fire. Hell, I even threw in some chocolate chips, though! Cause if I am going to pay a quarter for a rice crispy bar, it better have some damn chips! Well, I'm still trudging along with all the enthusiasm of a slug with a sore whatever slugs move with. Great weather lately though. At least I got all my outside crap done. We have been remodeling the parsonage and just got the word that it has been rented this morning. Cool! Havent made much real progress on my own place lately since I got the roof shingled. I guess after that small victory I have kind of taken it easy for a while. I have to make sure all the storms are all on and washed and good shape today. What is the freakin deal with printers nowadays? They are more trouble than they are worth. I just bought ink for this peice o' crap a month ago and now it wont use blue. When the hell did I use that much blue? You have got to be kidding me. I dont remember going on a blue printing frenzy! i sure feel blue though. Where did it go? Lexmark can kiss my absence of blue ass. Ahhhhhh, that felt good. Thanks for listening. At least I can depend on black. Good ol' black. trusty black. Hey, I had a surprise a few days ago. I watched "Click" and got more than I expected. I expected just a run of the mill Sandler comedy, but it actually ended up with an "its a wonderful life" edge to it I wasnt expecting. pretty entertaining, anyway. I also watched benchwarmers. Wow. Groundbreaking comedy there. Lots of fart jokes, nutsack hitting, and a really original underdog group of freinds come from behind and win at life story. Like I said. Wow. Well, I feel caught up with ya. Thats about it for whats new.

2006-11-10T04:28:00.000-08:00

Well I woke up early to pangs of pain in my lower back and snow on the ground. Good morning, my ass! This bites! I'm not ready!!!!!! Even though we had snow a month ago, it was a fluke. This is not a fluke. This is a harbinger of winter. I know I live in Minnesnowduh but I am still not ready. Movin on. I think I did too much at the gym last night. I havent been there for a week, so I was trying to make up for it. Man, my lower back kinda hurts. Nothing that a hot shower cant cure. Hey, did you see the CMA's the other night. Wow, when did country get so poppy? Seems like now all you need is a southern twang... nah, scratch that, look at keith urban, martina mcbride, and rascall flatts. Nothing country bout that. And I like country. Anyway, I just reread what I wrote and realized, sure enough, i am not morning people. Maybe later I will let you know about what I liked about my day. Worse case scenario... maybe not. I should probably make good use of this time and clean. Ha, fat chance. I will probably surf till its time to go to work!

2006-11-07T16:43:00.000-08:00

Well, its election day. I know, I know, "thanks for the special report, Captain Obvious" Just wanted you to know. I voted. I think I made a difference. Except in the judges and court of appeals section. Once again, I dont see any tight races coming out of that one. It is pretty much vote for John Doe... or the cute girl that works at Caseys. write ins. what a joke. I wonder how many votes she gets, anyway? I can see the ticker now, zooming by at the bottom of my tv screen at the speed of a Governor hopeful bowing out gracefully after a sudden tourettes like outburst escaping from his mouth before he can pop it back in or.. sorry. got a little off track there. Anyway, Cute Caseys Girl wins! With promises of fresh donuts every morning and coffee so strong they will have to scrape you off the ceiling with a 99 cent ice scraper. Thats what wins elections folks. The never ending promises of a better life. Less taxes. More take home money. Better roads. Brighter kids. Just that warm fuzzy feeling you get that things are going to be better. Every four years. It gets a little better. Right. dream on. I dont think any of these guys really do a tenth of what they say they will. Its who can dazzle us with the biggest load of crap. I think the biggest reason I vote is so I can feel better about saying this stuff. Its like a golden ticket to say later on things like "Caseys girl sure came through on that new stronger coffee referendum" or "Man, I told you John Doe was a dumbass!" HA, HA, ha, ha! LOL! Thats ironic! Dancing with the Stars just came on. If your going to throw a vote away...

2006-11-06T17:14:00.000-08:00

No news is good news. And makes for pretty lean blog entries. Sorry. My sister and her family got a new van. A 91 dodge caravan. new to them, anyway! Its in pretty good shape actually. And this is the kicker, I have acummulated so much stuff, I was actually able to tell my brother in law that I might have something in the back when he said it needs a back seat! and sure enough, I did! Now heres where things get a little out of hand. When someone says "I need a pair of gloves" and you give them one from home, thats normal. When someone says, "hey, I need a back seat for my 91 dodge van" and you give them one from home, thats when a mental inventory is needed more than a physical one is. Unless your a junk dealer, then, right back to perfectly normal. If your just a guy, like me, too much crap. Next time someone offers me a vehicle seat, I will just respectfully decline. No thank you. I'm good. I already have some. But yet, I watch "antique roadshow" sometimes and see these people going nuts because this crappy table they were given is worth 25 to 30,000 bucks just because it was the first one made by an early colonial one eyed drunk who used to shoe Benjamin Franklins horse. I have a friend who is a junk dealer. collector. Purveyor of gently used items. Whatever you want to call him, if your looking for it, he has probably got it. So he is providing a pretty good service, and I just plain need to do some housecleaning. I think I see a plan forming here.

2006-10-25T17:23:00.000-07:00

Sorry folks. But now if you want to leave a comment here you have to be a human being and not be trying to get anyone to look at your men in stockings written in Duetsch website. My fault, though. I forgot to put up the "No Soliciting" sign. Silly robot, comments are for kids! I was thinking though, you must have to really have to send out a lot of unwanted comment invasions to reach that one person thinking, "Hey, what a coincidence, I was just pondering this morning about German men in womens stockings. And look at that, here is a link to a website written all in German, just for me! Thanks, German men in womens stockings website linkers. My day is complete." Hell, even a blind squirrel finds a nut, though, I suppose. You know there is something for everyone out there though. I happen to think women in sweatpants are kind of hot... Thats just how I roll. Maybe from some buried girls gym class high school daydream hidden in my psyche somewhere, I dont know. Ha, only 74 hits for women in sweatpants on google. Now 75, I suppose. Anyway, enough of that, I spent the last few days up in Wadena putting in a new subfloor, basement door, and then tile for some freinds. It went pretty well. A lot of little chores sure add up, though. It was really nice to get away for a few days, even if it was working. I always really dig just leaving this little burg for a day or 2. If it was everyday, it probably wouldnt be that big of a deal. wednesday night, already. This week is just flying by. Well, I just ran out of substance, and now its just fluff. I will let you go know before I start talking about the weather. Its nice out tonight. Crap...

2006-10-19T18:40:00.000-07:00

Woahhhh, 8:30, I should be sleeping! Got to be up early to help with the big Hunter's Breakfast that the church is putting on for the next few days. This morning we broke even. It is going for adding on to the church fund. And I get a free breakfast. And free coffee. Cool. This week has flown by. If you dont hear from me a while, its because the big shingle shipment came in, and as we speak, The pallet of cobblestone grey shake is sitting out in my yard yelling at the top of its lungs "Hey Typie McType Type, get off your lazy ass and get out here and put us on the roof before it snows again and you have to shovel around us like the deck and concrete you havent quite got set in yet from last year!" So, I will try to let you know how its coming. later. Cosmic Junkie

2006-10-13T19:59:00.000-07:00

Happy freakin' annifreakin'versary to me! A whole week. No smokes. Usually I would have had a couple by now but not tell anybody and still don the nonsmoker halo. Not this time. No, no, no... Now its just me and God waiting to see if I will crack. He has a lightning bolt with my name on it, I just know it. I promised God I would quit smoking. Quitting smoking totally with no sneaked... snoked, snoken, ahhh... snuck, thats it, snuck smokes, reaaaaally bites. Thank you God for your patience. but you can save that lighning bolt for the politician of your choice. Heck just graze them ALL if you want. Scare em just a little. Go nuts. Sorry. shouldnt say that. But you were thinking it too. I am finally free of the sweet satisfiying taste of a Camel Wide. AHHhhhhhhhhh. Anyway, in my attempt to quit smoking its made me do some really strange things like being nice to my family, getting along great with my boss, and going to a high school football game just for the hell of it tonight. It was kinda fun. Sitting in 33 degrees and a cold wind with my ass frozen to a metal bleacher seat while weird looking parentless little kids move past me with painted faces and snot revealing cold white skin like a river running from the nostril cavern to the gulf of little Suzie was actually fun! In fact I was reminded of who I am today and who I was 20 years ago. Digging way to the back of the Cosmic Junk Drawer we find the happy fuzzy memory of a young Mark who got to go to the game, hang with friends, drink hot Dr. Pepper, spend all his money on cheap hot dogs, yell, wonder what this strange burning sensation is in my esophagus, laugh, wonder why the younger kids act like dorks, and never see one minute of the big game. Today, it was hang with friends, bitch about how freaking cold it is, yell, laugh, wonder why the younger kids act like dorks, drink hot chocolate, wish they would just run the clock out because they won like 36 to 7, try and beat the parking lot rush, and finally... have a pretty good idea what this strange burning sensation is in my esophagus is. Well, wish me luck. and now you will wonder if I snoke a smoke when you see a lightning flash in the distance. Or maybe it's George Bush.

2006-10-10T19:14:00.000-07:00

Man... ya start singing ONE christmas song at the mention of snow in the forecast, and everyone looks the other way... or turns a deaf ear. Well, the new nephew is getting along just fine, in fact, he gained a few ounces in the last week, and my sister found out he has a great set of lungs. Just like uncle Mark. Even though mine are full of small fuzzy animals lately since I quit smoking, and not sneaking a smoke once in a while. Who knew a guy could have that much lungbutter. Other than keeping the camel off my back, nothing else is new. Enjoyed the first couple of episodes of season 2 of "My name is Earl" between that, and the complete first season on dvd, I feel complete. I hope you someday enjoy it as much as I do. I dont know what Hollywood was thinking, throwing that much talent, morals, good storyline, and humor at the same wall and making it all stick without a canned laughtrack, but they did! Shame on them too, for making the rest of tv look bad. Maybe the rest of tv will get a clue and realize "Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, we want to be original too! This sucks!" and actually do something about it. Nope, Mr T., former star of the A team, now king of the B list, has a reality show on Tv land. Nuff said. at least Hollywood is into recycling. I know, if you cant say something nice about someone...

2006-10-03T19:14:00.000-07:00

Life is good!

It sure is easy to get bogged down with small problems. And even easier to forget the blessings. I have to admit, I got it pretty good. Good job, good freinds and family, house is paid off and vehicles paid off, and God is still looking out for me! So what is it that makes a guy forget about all that sometimes. I dont know. Sometimes a person has to just remind themselves of all the good things. Anyway, I should forget about all this "12 hour workday no time to myself", what about work for this winter, and what about the other guy crap, and count my blessings and enjoy today. I am too young to worry this much about the future. Screw that! Maybe this is just the new nonsmoker in me talking, I dont know. A buddy of mine turned me on to snuff, but it just doesnt cut the mustard. Sometimes you just want to suck some poison into your lungs! Ahhhhh, sweet poison. Ma came to visit. She is helping my sister with the new baby. Baby and sis are doing fine btw. Well, thats enuogh non sequiter ramblings for tonight. Have a good nite and God bless!

2006-09-28T19:39:00.000-07:00

My sister had her kid. I am an uncle once again. And I have seen some ugly newborns before, but... and you think you know where I'm going with this... but your wrong! Matthew Lynn is the best looking newborn I have seen! He obviously takes after his uncle. Anyway, no worries, bouncing baby boy. Healthy. And heres the kicker. Absolute miracle! 17 years ago my sister was in an accident, 2 month coma, and doctors said if she came out of it, she would be nothing more than a vegetable. In the mean time, she woke up, relearned everything, finished college, got married, and now had a kid. Anything is possible. I dont think I have been this psyched up about being an uncle again before, but its pretty cool. on to the other thing. I am a huge fan of "My Name is Earl" I really dig how they hid a moral in primetime tv. I recieved my copy of season 1 on dvd tuesday, so betwwen working till 8 or 9, a new nephew, and multiple episodes to check out, I have been pretty silent. Sorry bout that. I will try a little harder. well, no offence, but you are distracting me from the new dvd, so have a good night.

2006-09-21T19:15:00.000-07:00

Wellllllll...

The boss is taking off for a long weekend in Iowa. (I hear its the new Vegas) So, its same old thing for me tomorrow. Wake up and get to the job by 8 am, get right to work, short lunch, and right back at it till 5. Riiiiight. 8:15, early lunch, long lunch, take off at 4:30 so I can meet a cute little Vixen for coffee at 5. Yep, that sounds a lot better. There is something about working alone. Its all you. Credit, problems, its all up to you. The bad side is, noone else to blame. The good side is, its a lot of painting and a little bit of sheetrock patching. Whats the worse that could happen? (yep, you just ask for trouble when you say something like that) Looks like a pretty lean weekend for fun, though. Siding on Saturday, and rest on Sunday) Unless cute little Vixen wants to hang out again, then things will be a lot more fun. Other than that not too much going on. I really am feeling nostalgic, though, after reading a friend of mine's blog. http://goosesauce.blogspot.com/ You should check it out. She is very entertaining. She was talking about how seeing something could spur old warm memories. How true. If I am on an old dusty gravel road, it always brings me back to my childhood spent on my grandparents farm, going on trips with my grampa as he would haul load of gravel to customers. Every trip was an adventure to a kid! Somewhere new all the time. He would allways have lots of cookies and diet pepsi and pop gelucel in his mouth like a junkie.(cosmic?) He is in a nursing home now, and I keep thinking I should go and see him but I never seem to have the time. Pretty sad. I think its pretty cool how something can just spur old memories like that at a moments notice. Like digging in the old junk drawer. You know its in there, ya just gotta find it. Somethings are in plain site, and somethings you have to dig for. Well, I guess this one has run its course. Have a good one.

2006-09-18T18:51:00.000-07:00

Nothing much going on today. I do construction mostly. Anything from maintenance to framing. We are currently finishing up a remodel job in a big fancy house. Plenty of painting, patching, and trim. Thank god for inside work on a day like today! I think it broke 53 degrees. It was rainy, windy, and crappy for pretty much the whole day. I am starting to really worry about getting my own stuff done, new shingles, before it snows. I should at least buy the shingles now that gas prices have gone down. What does that have to do with petrol distillates, you say? Well, I'm glad you asked! The cost of a barrel of oil not only affects gasoline prices, but all of the other things made from oil. Like kerosene, diesel, propane, heating oil, and asphalt, wich is used in roads... and shingles. Tomorrow I will teach you how to make moonshine. Just kidding. All things are relative, dear oil consumers. So when you see everything going out of whack when BP, shell, or Exxon/Mobil decides they need a few extra bucks this week, thats why. Let me ask you something. Why is pizza bad for us? It seems like the perfect food. All of the OLD food groups are represented. (There is a crapload of new ones now like the donut group. and candy, I think candy is a new one. Its amazing what you learn from an 8 year old!) Its got vegetables, dairy, grains, and meat. Who could ask for anything more? Throw some pineapple on there, and its perfect. Speaking of perfect, I started a new junk drawer today. I might put that empty screwdriver holder up. Just wait. and pipe cleaners. Yeah. pipe cleaners. Has anyone ever used one of those to clean a pipe? Probably not. But they make really good twist ties. I find it amazing that some things actually get used for their intended purpose. We were putting in some ductwork at the hotel recently and honest to Gods truth, we didnt use duct tape. We used this specially made metallic, peel and stick, high grade tape made for duct work. Not the all purpose duct tape I was brought up on! That stuff you use on everything else! And I think I have only used a cement block on a wall a couple of times. All other times were used for jacking trucks, college shelves, and fire pits! And the best one I have seen in a while is a fuel pump and some hose to siphon gas. sure it pumped fuel, but not the way it was originally intended! Guy called it an "Oklahoma credit card". That killed me! But, ingenuity and straying from intended purposes are what made this land great. Or the reason they put "do not use in the shower" warnings on hair dryers.

2006-09-17T18:02:00.000-07:00

If you ever wondered about whats the one thing that most normal people have in common... and I stress normal... here it is. We all have junk drawers. Physically, mentally, spiritually, we all got em. The one place where that theory, that black metal shiny thing you think came off of the new office chair but not sure where from exactly, or that unhappy memory of hanging by one foot from that elevator to your treehouse that you were positive was going to work, all goes to be dealt with later. Or till grandma comes with a butcher knife to cut you down from that foolproof elevator, without your consent. Problem solved. Maybe stuck behind the junk drawer. I dont know. I got rid of my kitchen bar this weekend. It was donated to the church as a coffee bar for in the back of the sanctuary. As I was cleaning it out, I emptied my junk drawer. And a fleeting thought ocurred to me to sort through it and find a new home for all this stuff. My next thought, and final one, for the junk drawer, was " find a box". Once again, problem solved! Sometimes a perfect system doesnt need to be tampered with. Just go with the flow, and find a box. Even people who live in boxes probably have a junk drawer to some point. Stuff that they are not sure when or if they will use. Maybe homeless people walk around thinking "A key. what am I doing with a key?" Anyways, a friend of mine talked me into starting a blog again, and I told her nothing interesting has happened lately and I wouldnt have anything to say. This is the best I could do for a first entry so I hope you enjoy it.